Normally, I would read a few chapters of a fitness textbook, take a few snippets then write down a blog post to help me studying. Today will not be the case. This post is more personal. Recently, we moved from the Northeast to the Mid-Atlantic. I volunteered to take the trip with our two boys (Normally, we would divide and conquer, but the wife stayed behind to clean our old house). I should preface this part of the post to let y'all know that my youngest (Noah) is autistic and my oldest (Hudson) has sensory issues and is most likely on the spectrum somewhere. Day to day activities is challenging when taking both boys anywhere. Take the grocery store for example, we have to get the cart that looks like a car so the youngest can ride and pretend to drive. If they are being used, then he wigs out. Not your normal young child tantrum, but full-blown meltdown. I'm talking screaming, crying and jumping up and down-basically causing a huge scene. Sometimes we wait in the car until that cart is returned so the trip will be easier. In the event that we do get the car, we have to go through every fruit and vegetable so he can name them. Noah has to help to, so every item he gets out and puts it in the cart. At the check-out line he has to take the items out, put them on the belt and insert the credit card. These seem like quirky behaviors but to us as a family it is normal. This is just a glimpse of normal day to day activities. If you know anything about kids with autism, then routine is paramount. Noah has to have a routine. Bath/Bedtime is a routine that we have down to a science. He has to have certain toys in the bath, certain PJ's, same song and same stuffed animal to sleep with. These are non-negotiable terms. Each move through the military has its own challenges; those are multiplied with him. Anyway, to the trip....
The night before I packed the car with HIS blanket, favorite stuffed animal, snacks and favorite toys. The day of the drive I woke them up a 4am with the plan of leaving at 4:30am. The goal was to have him sleep through the challenging part of the drive (New York, New Jersey). Then stop once we got on the Jersey Turnpike for stop. Mike Tyson once said, "Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth" This is exactly what happened. Not only was Noah wide awake he wanted to scream out everything he saw. "Dada, I see a building", "Dada, I see a car", "Dada, I see a plane", "Dada, I see Dunkin Doughnuts". "Dada, I want doughnuts" Nothing like having your young son scream about doughnuts that early in the morning. So, naturally, we stopped for doughnuts. The sugar seemed to jump start his little body as he wigged out during traffic in New York. Driving through New York is tough enough let alone a screaming six-year-old. Every time we hit traffic and had to slow down. It was "Oh man, not again. Come on cars.... Dada is driving! Dada honk the horn! We eventually made it out and hit the Jersey Turnpike. With snacks running low and patience running thin I was freaking out because we were only halfway through. It got super quiet in the backseat, and I was a little worried. When you hear nothing, but none stop screaming for 4 hours it's a little concerning. Looking back through the rear-view mirror I noticed that Noah fell asleep. Thank Goodness! I was able to turn up a sports podcast and zone out during the long stretch of the Turnpike.
Getting outside of D.C. he woke up and lo and behold more traffic. Rinse wash repeat the traffic mantra. We eventually made it through D.C. to my in-laws in Northern Virginia (13-hour trip!). Keep in mind that I had my oldest in the car and bless his little heart he did the best he could with all the noise. I could tell his was frustrated but he kept his cool. Hudson even deployed calming techniques that we use on Noah. "Ok Noah, deep breath, count to ten, it's going to be ok" Those moments make me want to cry as a father; knowing that Hudson doesn't always get our undivided attention due to Noah and still attempts to calm him down.
I was emotionally exhausted by the time we hit our stop for the night. Since it was around dinner time both kids ate, and I thought we were on cruise control for the evening. Nope! see above Tyson quote. The boys had so much energy it was crazy. Running around the backyard playing tag, "Dada, chase me" "Tag....your it" I did my best, but physical exhaustion was taking its toll. Bath was another round of screaming and meltdowns because the routine was different. Bedtime was another fight, "Dada, I want lullaby's, Dada I want my bed, dada I want nightlight" It went on and on for hours. I have no idea when we went to bed. All I know is I woke up with one kid to my left and another kid laying sideways across me.
Even with all the challenges associated with the trip. I wouldn't have changed anything about the trip. Having two children with special needs makes me a better father. I'm more attentive with them. I can't zone out on my phone or read during our outings because both have a certain quirk that I need to keep up with. My focus needs to be on them because socially both have struggles, so I end up playing with them. Ever seen a grown man navigating through obstacles created for kids? yep, that's me. We have an expression in our house. "Noah being Noah" Whenever he does something weird that's Noah being Noah, when he sprints back and forth in the house. It's Noah being Noah.
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| Hudson reading the post about Noah |
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